Significantly Insignificant: Why Is Your Brand Ignored?

Google ‘brand love’ and the responses are evenly split. Half the pieces say no modern brand can thrive without it. Half of the pieces say it doesn’t exist.

I can see why marketers get seduced:

- They think brands are special, that their brand is special,

- They think their brand is central to people’s lives,

- They want cuddles, especially from strangers.

(Weirdly treating the public with contempt, even though they want cuddles). Digress.

And don't even get me started on the horseshit called Love Marks from former Saatchi CEO Kevin Roberts.

Behavioural economist Gerd Gigerenzer said in 2015, people look to make ‘fast and frugal’ choices – decisions that are quick and easy. We, the human race, are satisficers not maximisers.

Lest we forget, Jenni Romaniuk’s book Building Distinctive Brand Assets, showed that 90% of Brits consider just two brands when making a purchase. Only a tiny proportion of people make excel spreadsheets… these crazy people should be completely ignored by marketers.

In a world of good-enough decisions. How can someone argue there's brand love… otherwise known as significance.

Because brand love relies on the idea that brands are significant, but they're insignificant.

Bob Hoffman, in the book Eat Your Greens.

“The demand for advertising is precisely zero. There is no audience... Similarly, the idea that anyone wants to engage with advertising is equally delusional. We engage with people and things we enjoy. Books, music, dance. On a rainy Sunday afternoon have you ever heard someone say, ‘I’m going back to my flat to engage with some advertising’?”

People are lazy. Even the workaholics like Elon Musk are lazy.

I don't need to cite a study to prove that. Just look at yourself, your friends, your husband... fecking bone idle.

So if people are chuffin’ lazy and they have no demand for advertising. Then why do marketers think their brand is significant?

And again I don't need to cite any evidence here. Just look at every marketer you've ever met. They think their brand is central to people’s lives. Even the marketers in B2B brands, where they have to explain the category before mentioning the brand name. Even they think they're central and vital to people’s lives.

It’s easier that way. Because if a marketer has to accept they're not central, then they have to do some flippin’ marketing. 

Market orientation, looking at the category and pains from the view of the public. The primary role of any marketer. Would demonstrate their brand and all brands are insignificant.

So what do the public care about?

Friday night drinks down the pub. 

If there’ll be parking when they go shopping on Saturday. 

The lump they've found in their armpit.

And if the kids will EVER. STOP. FUCKING. ARGUING.

They definitely don't care about brands. And why a brand is faster, better, cheaper, stronger than the competition.

They probably don’t even consider competition in the same way a marketer does. The competition for Corn Flakes might be All Bran, but equally it could be toast, bagels, yoghurt with cinnamon flavoured granola sprinkles or no breakfast at all.

Mark Ritson observes: “The competitor that fucks you is the one that you never thought could fuck you and by the time it’s fucking you it’s too late to do anything about the fucking.”

He’s a sharp cookie, that Ritson fella.

At best, marketers at the absolute top of their game are; constantly orientating to the market, have the 4Ps humming away perfectly, have their brand totally on point, are always referring back to their strategy, have the best advertising creative imaginable… do all of that and they might just be considered satisfactory. That they 'satisfice' the public’s requirement for something 

And if you can get your head wrapped it around that. Then you've got a great chance at being one of the top brands in your category.

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Want more of this rubbish? Every Tuesday at 9am (UK) I broadcast live on LinkedIn. 

Next Tuesday’s question… HOW DO UNDERDOG BRANDS GET NOTICED?